Is this world a playground… or a battleground?

“Playground or Battleground”

as printed in Alliance Weekly, authored by A.W. Tozer, Chicago, Illinois, 1952 (thanks, Ben!)

“In the early days, when Christianity excercised a dominant influence over American thinking, we conceived the world to be a battleground. Our fathers believed in sin and the devi l and hell as constituting one force; and they believed in God and righteousness and heaven as the other. Man, so our fathers held, had to choose sides; he could not be neutral.  For him it must be life or death, heaven or hell, and if he chose to come out on God’ s side he could expect open war with God’s enemies. The fight would be real and deadly and would last as long as life continued here.  Men looked forward to heaven as they would to returning home from the wars, laying down of the sword to enjoy in peace the home prepared for them. How different today. The fact remains the same, but the interpretation has changed completely. Men think of the world not as a battleground but as a playground. We are not here to fight, we are here to frolic. We are not in a foreign land, we are at home. We are not getting ready to live, we are already living, and the best we can do is to rid ourselves of our inhibitions and our frustrations and live this life to the full. This changed attitude toward the world has had and is having its effect upon Christians, even gospel Christians who profess the faith of the Bible…They might hedge around the question if they were asked to declare their position, but their conduct gives them away. They are facing both ways, enjoying Christ and the world too, and gleefully telling everyone that accepting Jesus does not require them to give up their fun…their worship a sort of sanctified late night clubbing without the champagne and the dressed up drunks. Sides do not enter into it.”

Just what I needed

“Be Still, My Soul”
by Catharina von Schlegel, 1697-?
Translated by Jane Borthwick, 1813-1897

1. Be still, my soul; the Lord is on thy side;
Bear patiently the cross of grief or pain;
Leave to thy God to order and provide;
In every change He faithful will remain.
Be still, my soul; thy best, thy heavenly, Friend
Through thorny ways leads to a joyful end.

2. Be still, my soul; thy God doth undertake
To guide the future as He has the past.
Thy hope, thy confidence, let nothing shake;
All now mysterious shall be bright at last.
Be still, my soul; the waves and winds still know
His voice who ruled them while He dwelt below.

3. Be still, my soul, though dearest friends depart
And all is darkened in the vale of tears;
Then shalt thou better know His love, His heart,
Who comes to soothe thy sorrows and thy fears.
Be still, my soul; thy Jesus can repay
From His own fulness all He takes away.

4. Be still, my soul; the hour is hastening on
When we shall be forever with the Lord,
When disappointment, grief, and fear are gone,
Sorrow forgot, love’s purest joys restored.
Be still, my soul; when change and tears are past,
All safe and blessed we shall meet at last.

Thanks, sweet friend of mine.  I sure needed that.  :)

-N

An update on my sweet Annie-babe and WEM: Chapter 1

“(W)e, who live remote from history and monuments, we must read or we must  barbarise.” – William Dean Howells, “The Rise of Silas Lapham”

Focus has been difficult this week… and it’s week one of our little reading endeavor.  I can’t get my baby girl out of my head.  The last five days, although tempered with a surprise free weekend in the mountains, were challenging to say the least.  The amount of medication she is supposed to take is staggering… 10ml diluted in an ounce of water FOUR times a day.  That may not seem like much, but this is a tiny one who has a hard time eating or drinking much of anything, let alone chugging some not-so-tasty supplement constantly.  She gagged the first day… and vomited up everything we had worked so hard to get her to eat.  I just about fell apart.  I’ve been getting it into her, screaming and fighting the whole time, with a 5ml syringe (four of these equals one dose)… a little bit at a time just in front of her tongue so she won’t gag.  Praying that she won’t spit it out.  And we have yet to make it to the required four times… two the first full day, three yesterday.  No fun, people.  No fun at all.

I am just praying that this stuff starts to do its job quickly, so her appetite will increase and maybe, just maybe, she’ll be more receptive to the additional liquid in her system.  Please  pray for her.  And if you have a free moment, a shout-out prayer for her worried momma might help too.

So…

With 99% of my mind elsewhere I open the book to begin this week’s reading.

I open my notebook.

The first notes already gracing the page are purely personal — hypothetical first names for our future to-be-adopted daughter.  The middle name, that one is settled… but who she is — who she will be — has yet to be revealed.  Until then, I’ll continue to try on names in my mind and on the pages.

I digress.  Already.

Can you tell my focus has been on anything but “the serious pursuit of reading”?

So, Chapter 1.  I call this Bauer’s “cheerleading” chapter… presenting the case for serious reading, encouraging us that it’s not a lack of intellectual capacity but a lack of practice that keeps us from the joy that comes from diving into the Great Books.  Our minds are hungry, but if we focus always “on the contemplation of little things” and fail to exercise our minds appropriately, as Lydia Sigourney noted in her “Letters to Young Ladies” in 1839, we “are in danger of losing the intellectual appetite.”

I particularly appreciated Bauer’s brief analogy of the discipline of reading to any other serious pursuit, i.e. running regularly or engaging in prayer:

“Any able adult can run across the backyard, but this ability to put one foot in front of another shouldn’t make him think that he can tackle a marathon without serious, time-consuming training.  Most of us can manage to sing ‘Happy Birthday’ or the Doxology when called for, but this doesn’t incline us to march down to the local performing arts center and try out for the lead in ‘Aida’.

“Yet because we can read the newspaper or ‘Time’ or Stephen King without much difficulty, we tend to think that we should be able to go directly to Homer or Henry James without any further preparation.  And when we stumble, grow confused or weary, we take this as proof of our mental inadequacy:  We’ll never be able to read the Great Books.

“The truth is that the study of literature requires different skills than reading for pleasure.  The inability to tackle, unaided, a list of Great Books and stick to the project doesn’t demonstrate mental inadequacy — just a lack of preparation.” (17)

I don’t know about you, but that little pep-talk helped this momma immensely.

So, what should be our takeaways from this week’s reading?  What steps must we take as we begin to train for this marathon we call literature?

1.  Study one thing at a time. Let the fact that you’re not in school (at least most of you) be of great benefit here.

2.  Read through one genre at a time. That’s exactly what we’re going to do.  I thought briefly about trying to condense the reading lists contained in the book for the sake of brevity… but decided against it.  If we’re going to do this, then, well we’re going all in.

3.  Read chronologically. Again, that’s the plan.  The lists in the second half of the book do just that, and we’ll follow them.  So, if you’d like you can start tracking down copies for yourself, I suggest you start now.  Maybe I’ll figure out how to do an “Amazon Store” with all the books and put the link up on the blog.  I wonder how that works…

4.  Schedule regular reading and self-study time. Bauer suggests that you don’t schedule it for every day because you’re likely to miss one occasionally.  I tend to disagree with her on this, as I find that — like regular quiet times and prayer — if it’s not an every day habit, it won’t happen after the first few weeks.  Of course we’ll all miss out occasionally on our scheduled times — any number of things could grab away our attention… wee, adorable little needy kiddos come to mind.  :)  But I have seen the value of separating out time on a daily basis, and guarding that important time, and I encourage you to consider whether doing the same would help maintain consistency in your own schedule.

For me, my biggest challenge this week is to take Bauer’s advice and NOT check email before reading.  I’ll let you know how I did next week.  :)

How was the reading for you?  What will you take away?  What do you see as your biggest challenge in this area?

We have a diagnosis…

The results are in.

Annie clearly has RTA (renal tubular acidosis), which causes the suppression of her appetite and growth hormones and — if left untreated — could cause permanently stunted growth and major kidney problems.  Thankfully, she has been diagnosed early, and it is treatable; we’re picking up a prescription this afternoon.  She’ll likely be on this medication for a few months to a year, and although it won’t be any fun for her to take (think Alka-Seltzer), her body should respond to it within a week and we’ll see a marked increase in her appetite and growth.

Thanks for your prayers.  We were praying for wisdom from her pediatrician and for clarity in diagnosis, and we got both in spades.

Stay tuned for pics of a plumper Annie in the coming weeks!  :)

I'll be eating more soon!

Well, that pretty much stunk.

The morning, that is.

As those of you who know us personally know, we generally breed large in this family.  Both of our boys weighed in just under ten pounds at birth; Jonah is now five years old and on the taller side, while Bode’s growth remains off the top of the charts for a two-year old.

Our third child, however, is a bit of an enigma.

Annie, at ten months old, STILL weighs less than Bode did… when he was two months old.  By more than a pound.  Note that Bode was practically a giant of a child, but still.  We had to go in to the pediatrician this morning for a “routine weight check” because Annie had tanked off the bottom of the growth chart at her nine-month appointment.

“Routine.”  Ha.

The good news?  She had gained .5 inches in height and 7 ounces in four weeks:  Annie is now 14 pounds, 10 ounces… 27 1/4 inches tall.  Her height is fine, her head circumference looks great.

The bad news?  She was still off the bottom of the growth chart for weight.  So… the worst hour of her young life ensued.  She was catheterized to get a urine sample, then the nurses tried three different times to get enough blood from her tiny veins to run the necessary lab tests.  THREE DIFFERENT TIMES.  In THREE DIFFERENT PLACES.  And as the mommy, I got the privilege of using my own body weight to practically lay on top of her to minimize her movement.  Her screaming, thrashing movement.  While they poked and prodded my sweet baby girl.  Again.  And again.

The nurses were lovely, and they were as gentle as they could possibly be about it all.  Annie won’t remember it.  But still.

And my Annie was a champ, at least according to all present.  They had never seen a baby take it so well.  So they said.  Maybe they say that to all the traumatized mommies.

We’ve since made it home, Annie is sleeping peacefully (and likely will be for several hours), and I have thanked God repeatedly that Bryan decided to come home from work to care for the boys so we wouldn’t risk them getting sick from all the doctor’s office germs.  I can’t imagine going through all that with them in the room.

So, like I said:  That pretty much stunk.

If you think of it, we would appreciate any prayers on Annie’s behalf.  Our pediatrician should call with the lab results tomorrow sometime.

Grow Your Mind Monday: Week ONE!!!

“It seems to me that the world is now more than ever dominated by the gods of mass and speed and that the worship of these can lead only to the lowering of standards, the adulteration of quality, and, in general, to the loss of those things which are essential to the life of civility and culture. The tendency to look with suspicion upon excellence, both intellectual and moral, as ‘undemocratic’ shows no sign of diminishing.”  - Richard M. Weaver, Ideas Have Consequences (1948)

“The mind is not a vessel to be filled, but a fire to be kindled.”  - Plutarch

* * * * *

Welcome to the first week of your self-education!

We are about to engage in the increasingly little known but very “serious pursuit of historical reading,” an endeavor that takes desire, preparation, and practice to be successful.  And, by golly, we’re doing it by ourselves.  Without the perceived benefit of a lecture hall or any other such intellectual safety net.  Just you and the book.  And me.  And those others in bloggy-land who have committed to accompany us on this little literary joyride.

YA HOO!!

Just thought about all those lovely classics I’ll be getting my hands on — and head around — in a few short weeks.  Whew.  I’ll try to calm myself down.  :)

Questions about how all this is going to work?  I thought you might have a couple.

Q:  So… What is this little bloggy book club going to look like?

As I mentioned here and here, we’ll be reading through The Well Educated Mind. We’re going to start off nice and slow this first week by reading only Chapter 1, which provides a pretty thorough overview of the “why” of classical education: why we all need to retrain our minds to read critically, to actually learn and respond effectively to information, and, ultimately, to pursue intellectual excellence.  That first chapter should give you plenty to chew on, especially if this is your first exposure to the ideals and goals of classical education.  I’ll post some thoughts on the reading (and I’ll welcome yours!) next Monday, and we’ll go from there, reading one chapter per week for the next four weeks until we’ve completed the “instructional” portion of the book (and my oh my, after that… well, that’s when the real fun begins!).  Sounds easy enough, right?

Q:  What will be required as far as reading, participating, etc.?

Other than the occasional expression of undying gratitude to the bloggy facilitator, , not all that much just yet.  We’ll get into the specifics of critical reading as we go, but for now, here are a few essentials:

1.  Carve out some time to read.  Alone.  Every day.

2.  Keep paper and a writing utensil with you as you read.  I use small two-subject notebooks, which tend to pack well in a purse and aren’t too bulky, but give you a fairly generous amount of writing space.

3.  Use them.  Jot down interesting/thought provoking quotes, questions, etc.  In other words, don’t just read for speed or to “get through it”… that’s the tendency we all have (because that’s the way we’ve been trained), and that tendency is exactly what we’re going to be working to eliminate over the course of this book.  Think while you read.  We’ll learn how to direct that thinking into something worthwhile later.  :)

4.  Talk about it.  Share your observations, questions, ideas, etc. here in the comments and/or with your real-life buddies.  They’ll think you went all crazy-intellectual on them.  :)

In the meantime, if during these next several weeks you find yourself getting all riled up about what passes for education today — and you have some additional reading time on your hands — may I suggest a few interesting titles.  These are oldies but REALLY goodies:

The Abolition of Man by C.S. Lewis

On Secular Education by R.L. Dabney

The End of Education by Neil Postman

Ideas Have Consequences by Richard M. Weaver

I’m excited about our little club, and I hope you are, too… I’m looking forward to next Monday already!  Questions/concerns/comments… all are welcome below.

A prayer request… and while we’re at it, How to Pray: Part II

“The difficulty of coming (to Jesus) just as we are is that we are messy.  And prayer makes it worse.  When we slow down to pray, we are immediately confronted with how unspiritual we are, with how difficult it is to concentrate on God.  We don’t know how bad we are until we try to be good.  Nothing exposes our selfishness and spiritual powerlessness like prayer…

“(But) this is the gospel, the welcoming heart of God.  God… cheers when we come to Him with our wobbling, unsteady prayers.  Jesus does not say ‘Come to me, all you who have learned how to concentrate in prayer, whose minds no longer wander, and I will give you rest.’  No, Jesus opens his arms to His needy children and says ‘Come to me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest.’ (Matthew 11:28.)  The criteria for coming to Jesus is weariness.  Come overwhelmed with life.  Come with your wandering mind.  Come messy.” – Paul Miller, A Praying Life

* * * * *

Can I tell you how much joy that simple truth brings to this momma’s often-weary heart?

Speaking of prayer:  As I’m working on some posts relaying the “details” of our adoption plans, we have a prayer request about the agency with which we should work.  If you all think about it, we would love if you prayed along with us for God to clearly lead us to the right agency… which will lead us to the right orphanage… which will lead us to the daughter God knew would be part of our family.  Thanks.

Grow Your Mind Monday: We’re Starting Next Week!

A few things for this bright and cheery Monday morning…

Just a reminder that right here on February 1, next Monday, we will be starting to read The Well Educated Mind together as part of our weekly “grow your mind” journey (for more on what we’re doing, check out this and this).  There’s still time to buy/borrow a copy before we begin!  I will be doing some general overview that day, and will assign the first reading at that time, so there’s no rush to read ahead this week… or maybe, if you’re like me, you’re reading like gangbusters trying to get through as many books on your “to do” list before then!

Part of my “reading like gangbusters” has been directed at reading through the Bible in a year.  I occasionally participate in the discussion over at my bloggy friend Andrea’s site (her family is waiting for a referral for their Ethiopian child… yippee!), and I have to tell you, the online community and accountability is just amazing!  If you’re interested, you can start right where we are… although I have to warn you, the book of Job is no fun at all.  Only a few more days…  :)

By the way, the prayers and well wishes you all are sending our way in response to our little announcement… wow, we are feeling them.  Thank you so, so much.  I plan to elaborate quite a bit on the prayer requests in the coming days, so stay tuned if you’re so inclined.  :)

Our wee little news!

Okay, so a few of you perhaps remember a few months ago when I asked for a few prayers about a few things we as a family were considering… and a few of you have even left a few messages/wall posts/inquiring IMs about them.  Those interested few may now be interested in knowing that as of now, just a few months later, we have those few things figured out.  The first few steps, anyway.

Few.

I mean, phew.

For those of you who were guessing, here is the picture I alluded to:

Now take a REALLY good look at Annie’s new shoes…

Have you guessed yet?  A few of you were REALLY close!

So here goes.

We are adding a new member to the Starr family.

NO, I’m not pregnant.

Well, not in the traditional sense of the word, anyway.

We are going to adopt a baby girl.

From Africa.

Ethiopia, to be exact.

(insert hyper-excited screams of joy here)

 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

We know, after months and months (years, if we are really being honest here) of prayer and consideration, that this is where, when, and to whom God has called us. And we could not, I repeat, COULD NOT be more excited… and nervous… and anticipatory… and anxious… than we are right now.

Many of you are (hopefully!) jumping for joy right alongside us.  Many of you probably also have questions.  I’ll get to all that in a later post.  Excuse me.  Posts, plural.  For now, we ask for your prayers as we look toward starting what is likely to be at least a 12-18 month process to bring another daughter and baby sister home to our family.

Oh, and YIPPEE!!!  :)

A Hint

For those of you (and let me just say, I am so impressed that so many of you remember!) who are still wondering about that “news” about which we asked for prayer some time ago… there’s a hint in one of the pictures from my Christmas post.  You may have to look hard.  Any ideas?

BTW, those of you who already know — and you know who you are!!! — stay mum for just a wee bit longer (in other words, don’t leak the news for us just yet!).  I have to tease this out just a little.  Let me have my fun.